Monday, September 13, 2010

How to Save $$ on dinner tonight

Sure, you could go out to eat. Yeah, go on and spend money on a tip and some food that you don't where it's been or who cooked it.

Or, maybe you could stay at home and whip up some crabcakes. That's some folks' idea of dinner. Some FANCY folks, maybe. But, what about your plan to save money so you can go to Tuscany someday? You better RETHINK.

Look in your cabinet and find a can o' soup. I know you've got at least one. It's turning fall weather and nothing's better than chicken'n'wild rice or split pea w/ ham. Who are you trying to impress on a Monday evening anyway? Pop open that can. Two, three minutes in the microwave, and dinner's done. Bust out a bag of gluten-free crackers, and you've got a feast! Tomato soup and a grilled cheese is mmm, mmm free.

Cost: $0.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

I am thankful for Michael Douglas

Sometimes, when I'm feeling snarky and mean as hell, I have to get out my little red notebook and write down a few things I'm thankful for:

1. I'm thankful for the lunch I packed that isn't very appetizing. The alternative could be no food at all. Back when I was a starving artist in Nashville, I gathered the change from my piggy bank so I could buy a can of soup for the day. I bought the soup and was walking back to my car when a homeless man asked me if I had any money. I gave him a handful of dimes (cuz I thought the pennies would be too insulting).

2. Just the other day, I was making funny faces in the mirror when I noticed my grey roots. I felt old and upset with myself that I hadn't gotten around to calling up the beauty shop. Then, I thought about the guy from Spenser for Hire who lost all his hair during chemo. I should be thankful for my hair, roots and all. I bet Michael Douglas is.

3. I was having a good time walking through the Salvation Army trying to find funny clothes to make a Halloween costume. Then, I saw families there shopping for their everyday clothes.

4. Sunday night, I was sitting on the couch upset that I got only 200 cable channels instead of 600. Then, I noticed my bookshelves, full of books I haven't read. So, I miss some must-see TV. So what. What was my favorite show five years ago? 10 years ago? I have no idea. But, I can tell you all about my favorite books (that's a post for another day).

5. I broke a bowl. I was mad until I counted up how many bowls I have. There are 17 left. I think I will get by. We all will.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Meeting Etiquette 101

I never sit at the head of the table for two reasons:

1) I have read Luke 14:7-11 (NIV).

2) I am the chair and CEO of Persian Metamarketing Ltd. (NYSE: PML), which employs approximately 612,000 people and operates 684 facilities in 111 countries, so I have nothing to prove.